The Future Of Swedish Pop - Olinda & Marie!

Olinda strikes a pose

One of my favourite acts of 2006 was the stunningly talented Swedish diva, Bionda. I'm sure you remember her as the ex-Big Brother contestant who formed her own political party in order to promote her pop career. It seems that Bionda is not the only tragic ex-reality TV tart to try her luck with a pop career in Sweden. Bionda's number 1 fan, Tommie, recently introduced me to Olinda and Marie Plosjo, two ex-reality "stars" who have released amazing pop songs. Where does Sweden keep all these beautiful, intelligent and gifted artists?

Olinda Borggren makes Bionda look positively demure. It seems that Olinda has a history of wearing no clothes and being a complete bitch to absolutely everyone. Some of Olinda's career "highlights" include making a complete spectacle of herself on Joe Millionaire 2 by crafting a dildo in a pottery class and removing Joe's pants in the swimming pool. After Joe Millionaire, Olinda returned to Sweden and appeared on another reality show called "Paradise Hotel". True to form, Olinda wore very little clothing and was a complete bitch. She has recently been generating headlines by claiming that Sweden is "the arsehole of the world". Olinda obviously hasn't been to Canberra.

Ratty slut

Amazingly, multi-talented Olinda also found the time to record a single, apppropriately titled "Playboy Bunny", and even filmed a craptastic video clip. The song is a divine slice of euro-pop that reminds me of Aqua and Cartoons. Olinda might be a ratty slut but her music is brilliant! I have no idea if the song was a hit but it should have been, if only for the amazing lyrics which include lines like "I'm hot and ready, to work you steady". Bionda should cover it! In her spare time, Olinda manages what appears to be a porn site with her boyfriend. The intro invites us to "enjoy the magical and fucked up world of Olinda and Patrick". I'm guessing that Olinda's world is more fucked up than magical.

Watch the video for "Playboy Bunny".

Marie Plosjo

The second amazing Swedish pop goddess does not quite have the trash pedigree of Olinda or Bionda but she is still incredibly fabulous. Marie Plosjo is another ex-"Paradise Hotel" contestant who has desperately tried to extend her 15 minutes of fame by embarking on a trashtastic pop career and dabbling in nude modelling. With her sister. Marie's "Boom, Boom, Boom" is not as spectacular as Olinda's "Playboy Bunny" but it is still a feast of poor vocals, cheap production and lazy instrumentation. Swedish pop does not get much more ghetto than this. It goes without saying that I absolutely love "Boom, Boom, Boom"!

Watch the video for "Boom, Boom, Boom".

Marie & Monia Plosjo enjoy some good, old-fashioned sisterly fun

I think it's time to forget about Melody Club and BWO. The future of Swedish pop clearly lies with three tragic bitches called Bionda, Olinda and Marie. I can hardly wait to see which new low these ladies sink to next. Thanks again to Tommie for bringing my attention to these Swedish superstars.