I Can't Sleep At Night - Remixes

"I Can't Sleep At Night" was to have been the 4th single from "The Hits & Beyond". Remixes were commissioned and an utterly slutastic video was filmed, only for the project to be shelved in favour of "He's The Greatest Dancer" - which was also eventually cancelled. I wouldn't have picked "I Can't Sleep At Night" as a single, "Gone" was the obvious choice in my opinion, but it seems incredibly wasteful to throw everything away at the last minute. The video would have ensured some media attention and the remixes are, as usual, excellent. The promotional strategies of AATW remain one of life's great mysteries but at least Dannii keeps on churning out fabulous material.

Thanks to Jay and Tommie for the remixes. Enjoy the brilliant video for "I Can't Sleep At Night". Dannii is scorching hot - I love it!

Tut Tut (Does Your Mother Know?)

Does your mother know - that you don't wear pants?

The "Neon Nights" era was such an amazing time for Dannii. Not only did she turn out one of the best pop albums of the decade and establish herself as a pop force to be reckoned with (albeit briefly), she got everything just right - from the beautiful cover art to the choice of singles. Even the B-sides and unreleased tracks are divine!



One of the many great unreleased tracks to leak from the "Neon Nights" sessions is "Tut Tut (Does Your Mother Know?)". The song is Dannii at her slutty best, purring her way through camp lyrics like "you look like a baby boy on the outside, but you're not too young to know I feel the man inside". Filth! The song really doesn't fit in with the "Neon Nights" synth-pop sound but it is a fun addition to Dannii's treasure chest of trashy pop delights. "Tut Tut (Does Your Mother Know?)" was to have been included on the scheduled "Platinum Collection" but that release has been postponed (ie. scrapped). "Tut Tut" is a grower - I hope you like it.

Put The Line In The Coconut

"Coconut" is Dannii's most tragifabulous pop moment. According to Dannii, she was inspired to cover the song while waiting in a doctor's surgery after being bitten by an insect. Apart from the refrain of "Doctor!", I don't really see the connection between the song and Dannii's terrifying medical emergency, but that's beside the point. Dannii was moved to record "Coconut" and it ended up as the hidden track on Dannii's criminally underappreciated third album, "Girl". I find the very concept of hidden tracks baffling, but releasing the hidden track as a single is simply bizarre.

In fact, just about everything about "Coconut" is crazy. The song was released as the fourth single from "Girl" in Australia well after the album was dead and buried, without a video and with even less promotion than usual. There is a video clip that plays on high rotation in Sydney gay bars but that is a fanmade montage of old material. It's not that unusual to release an underpromoted single but the quality of the the song's tracklisting is. "Coconut" contains the brilliant "Everybody Changes Under Water", "Someone New" - the mammoth 9 minute plus Japanese bonus track, as well as several rare mixes of "Heaven Can Wait". The excellent "Someone New" would have to be one of Dannii's most stunning B-sides. Its omission from the album is an utter disgrace. While "Heaven Can Wait" is one of the many fabulous tracks Dannii recorded with Xenomania before they went shit and starting working with Whores Aloud and unloaded the stinking "Giving You Up" on poor Kylie.

On its release, "Coconut" limped to #62 on the Singles Chart but became an instant gay classic. I still hear the song almost every time I go to a club. There is even a popular drug taking game, which takes the lyric "put the line in the coconut" quite literally. Not that I have any knowledge of that kind of outrageous behaviour. In any case, "Coconut" is still being played and enjoyed almost a decade later - no small feat for a song that failed to make the top 50.

The Dannii Gallery - Fabulous Fan Art

During my years as a Dannii fan, I have become increasingly wary of Dannii's somewhat demented "fanbase" which seems to comprise of crazy homosexuals and fat fag hags obsessed to the point of insanity ("the droids"). I personally believe that the sun shines out of Dannii's delightful arsehole but I do still have some perspective, which is more than can be said for the droids. For example, I acknowledge that Dannii's career has been on the skids since joining AATW and I am aware that Dannii spends more time on holiday than promoting her floptastic singles.

Thankfully, there are still some Dannii fans with a sense of humour. One of the most fabulous is the brilliant artist otherwise known as MoistSexBox. I've collected some of my favourite fan art, the majority (if not all) of which was created by Mr Box. I love the references to Dannii's holiday habits (Holidannii!) and the mysterious Dannii goose. I wonder if you can eat it! However, I think my favourite might be "Dann-ra" pointing her finger at Kylie on stage, although the piss take of "Success" should be hanging in the Louvre too!

Boogie Woogie - Dannii's #1 Japanese Hit!!

"Boogie Woogie" is brought to you with thanks to Robpop. Lord only knows how many hours I'm going to have to spend on my knees repaying him for his kindness! Give Rob a thrill and check out his scandalous post on Kylie's divine "Light Years" at YouCallThatLife. I'm quite certain Rob must have been drugged to the teeth when he compared "Please Stay" to a Geri Halliwell B-side, but these great tracks more than make up for that usually unforgiveable slight!

Dannii collaborated with Eurogroove in 1995 for their Japanese greatest hits album at a point in time when her career was going nowhere fast in Australia. The result was two #1 Japanese hits - "Rescue Me" and "Boogie Woogie". Unfortunately, I don't have "Rescue Me" but from memory it has nothing on the camp brilliance of "Boogie Woogie", which is the closest to Whigfield that Dannii will ever sound. Rob also sent a couple of cheesy remixes that I had never heard. However, I have a feeling that they will be on high rotation at my place for quite some time to come.

Beginnings - Young Talent Time

When I say that I have been a fan of Dannii’s for as long as I can remember, I mean it quite literally. Some of the nicest memories from my childhood involve sitting down to watch “Young Talent Time” with the entire family. For those who are not familiar with the show, “Young Talent Time” was a weekly variety hour in which children would sing current chart hits and old pop favourites. I can only imagine how awful the show would be if it were made today. There would throngs of stage mums and pretentious little cunts talking about “following their dream” and “making it happen”. Back then, the stars of the show were completely oblivious to stardom and social mores were such that no one blinked when 10 year olds sang ballads about love-making! “Young Talent Time” was something of an institution by the mid-1980s when I started watching it, having been popular since the early 1970s. During its run the show unearthed some formidable talent – Debbie Byrne, Tina Arena and of course, Dannii.

It must be difficult for people who live outside Australia to imagine a time when Dannii ruled the Minogue roost and Kylie was the designated family joker. However, that was case before Kylie joined the cast of “Neighbours”. Growing up in Australia in the 1980s, Dannii was the coolest kid on the planet as THE star of “Young Talent Time”. Dannii transfixed a generation with her raunchy outfits, big hair and cutting-edge song selection, crossing over from being a mere television personality to being a bona fide pop culture icon. The boys at my (primary - I'm not that old!) school were in love with Dannii and all the girls were envious of her astoundingly voluminous perm. Dannii’s halcyon days came to an abrupt end in the late 1980s when “Young Talent Time” began to decline in the ratings and Kylie’s fame skyrocketed. In the years since “Young Talent Time”, Dannii has obviously gone on to bigger and better things - becoming an international pop superstar and universally praised actress. However, in my eyes Dannii will always be the girl who electrified television audiences with her vast array of sequined bubble skirts and dodgy hairstyles.

I’ve included some of my favourite Dannii YTT performances for your viewing pleasure:

Belle Of St Mark

I love this clip of Dannii covering Prince’s “Belle of St Mark”. The song is preceded with a skit about how much Dannii loves Prince, eating purple hamburgers and purple bread out of devotion to him! It's just too cute.



Open Your Heart

Dannii shows Madonna what “Open Your Heart” should sound like! This clip is pure magic. Dannii appears to be wearing the ugliest dress of the 1980s in some kind of tragic jungle setting. Too fabulous for words!



Ring Ring

Kylie covered “Dancing Queen” in the 90s but Dannii turned in the first ABBA cover version by a Minogue, when she sang “Ring Ring” on "Young Talent Time" a decade or so earlier. Dannii sure did know how to select songs by gay icons.



Sisters Are Doin' It For Themselves

I still remember this performance like it was yesterday. Dannii and Kylie teamed up for a duet just as Kylie-mania was sweeping through Australia like wildfire. The sisters recently teamed up to sing “Kids” during Kylie’s Australian and UK tour but their defining moment together is this cover of “Sisters Are Doin’ For Themselves”. Those glorious perms and silver dresses! I still can’t believe that Kylie ever sounded like such an Ocker. Her accent is hilarious. The clip is also interesting as it clearly demonstrates Dannii’s superior vocal and dancing ability. Kylie has done some serious work to become the peerless stage performer that she is today.

Chill Out Dannii - Take Me Inside

One of Dannii's more unusual recordings is her collaboration with Afterlife, "Take Me Inside". The song is a typical example of Afterlife's "chillout" sound, with a dreamy blend of strange bleeps and minimalist lyrics. I think this kind of material suits Dannii quite nicely. I wouldn't want an album of it but the occasional electro-lullaby makes quite a pleasant change of pace. "Take Me Inside" appears on Afterlife's "Speck Of Gold" album and the Petrol Records compilation pictured below.